Hiring with Yazztel or Orange is a matter of minutes. You fill out a form, sign digitally, and within 24 hours you have service. The problem comes when you decide to leave. That's when you go from being a customer to a target. The calls repeat, the arguments change, and your cancellation request becomes an endurance test. It's not a portability, it's an organized escape.
The technical retention system: loops and silences 🔄
The cancellation doesn't fail due to a technical error, but by design. The system redirects your request to a retention department that uses call center protocols with extensive scripts. Every time you call, the agent has access to your history and offers you discounts or contract extensions. If you insist, you get transferred to another operator who repeats the process. There is no real cancellation button on the website or the app. Everything is in-person or by phone, with waiting times of 20 minutes. It's a deliberate loop to make you give up.
Survival manual for the digitally harassed 🛡️
If you want to cancel, prepare for an intensive course in patience. First, call at 8:00 AM, when operators haven't had their coffee yet and are less creative. Second, don't accept offers even if they give you a router with quantum WiFi. Third, if they tell you your cancellation takes 72 hours, reply that you have a lawyer named ChatGPT and that you've already recorded the call. In the end, they'll cancel your service just so you don't write about them on social media anymore.