Batman and Catwoman: The Couple That Never Made It to the Altar (And Gotham is Grateful)
The event that promised to be the "wedding of the century in the DC universe" ended up being more fleeting than a one-comic villain. Just when everyone expected to see the Dark Knight exchanging vows with his feline beloved, Selina Kyle decided that stealing jewels was more fun than signing papers. Gotham breathed a sigh of relief: its streets were not ready for a Catwoman turned housewife.
"In the world of superheroes, 'forever' lasts until the next reboot"
The Three Times Love Played a Bad Trick on Batman
Bruce Wayne holds the record for failed dates in the DC universe, even beating The Flash when he's late to his own weddings. This wasn't the first time fate snatched marital happiness away from him:
- Andrea Beaumont: stood him up before he learned to fight with a cape
- Silver St. Cloud: discovered that sleeping in a cave wasn't very romantic
- Talia al Ghul: turned out to be... complicated (to say the least)
Why Catwoman Did the Right Thing (Even If It Hurts to Admit)
Selina Kyle proved to be smarter than 90% of Gotham's villains by realizing something fundamental: a happy Batman is like a serious Joker, it just doesn't work. Bruce's identity is so tied to his trauma that even his mansion has more ghosts than a horror movie. Do we really want to see him arguing about who forgot to take out the trash instead of chasing criminals?
The Silver Lining of a Broken Heart
Far from sinking, Batman turned his pain into fuel for his nightly crusade. Gotham had never been so clean of criminals, although taxi drivers started complaining about the increase in flying batmobiles. This evolution showed that even a traumatized bat can learn something:
- That therapy is more effective than punching clowns
- That a long-distance relationship works... if the distance is dimensional
- That Alfred was right (as always)
In the end, everyone won: Batman remains the loner we love, Catwoman kept her independence (and her collection of other people's jewels), and readers were spared a marriage plot that would have ended with some Joker clone kidnapping the bride. As they say in Gotham: better a good heist than a bad marriage 😼